Get Adobe Flash player
WHAT’S Happening?

Danger: if you meet it promptly & without flinching, you will reduce the danger by half. Never run away from anything. Never!- Winston Churchill

* Here There Be Goats->>
********************************
* Over 300k PAGEVIEWS!

* Follow Us On Facebook!

Follow BachelorGoat on Twitter

Follow BachelorGoat on Twitter

Polls

When Does Middle Age Begin?

View Results

Loading ... Loading ...

celebrities

The Remaining Bachelor Princes

My high school friend Heidi has had her heart set on Prince William for some time now, but with the future king of England finally marrying his future queen, Heidi can either go into mourning (poor girl) or set her sights on another prince. Yes, there’s Prince Harry, of course, but he’s not the only living bachelor prince wandering the earth sans royal consort. There are several eligible bachelor princes yet to be tricked into matrimony with Victoria's Secret Supermodels (as Prince Wenzeslaus of Liechtenstein nearly was). These men have the luxury of money, titles, family, and awesomeness. Lucky goats. Read the rest of this entry »

Firefly Campaign Gains Renewed Momentum

FireflySerenityNathanFillion Summer GlauNERD NEWS ALERT!!

Diehard “Firefly” fans are finding a new energy for their cause.  The cause?  BRING BACK “FIREFLY”!

Resurrect a space cowboy cult TV show that died on the vine 9 years ago?  Sure.  Why not?  Though a casualty in a string of Fox’s quick show cancellations in the 2000s, Joss Whedon’s “Firefly” found a highly devoted and rabid cult-following in its brief run.  Online and mail-in campaigns, as well as paid ads to renew the show at the time fell short, but enough momentum provided for a well-received “Firefly” movie, 2005’s “Serenity”, giving fans a taste of what might have been.

So where is this renewed fan energy coming from?  From Captain Malcolm Reynolds himself.  Nathan Fillion, who currently stars on

firefly women

Uber-glammed women of Firefly

ABC’s “Castle”, recently told Entertainment Weekly that he’d love to resume his role as Mal.  Going a step further he said, “If I got $300 million from the California Lottery, the first thing I would do is buy the rights to “Firefly,” make it on my own, and distribute it on the internet.”

Now, of course, online reactions to this off-the-cuff statement have started pouring in.  Former writers have told Twitter that they’d love to be involved.  Jewel Staite, who played the sunny mechanic Kaylee said she’d be on board.  A new website, Help Nathan Buy Firefly, even started as a means to collect pledges that would turn into donations should “Firefly” be revived.  The site’s Facebook page has gained nearly 50,000 members in only 5 days!  Another Facebook page, “Bring Back Firefly”, has also seen a surge in members as interest has blown-up.

ChristinaHendricksFireflyMadmen

Mad Men's Christina Hendricks guested on Firefly

While its mix of western and outer space themes was lost on some critics, “Firefly” was critically acclaimed, notable for its design and special effects, winning an Emmy for the latter. Additionally, strong writing and a great ensemble cast made it a fan favorite. Besides Fillion and Staite, the cast included, Ron Glass (“Barney Miller“), Morena Baccarin (“V“), Summer Glau (“The Cape“), Gina Torres (“Alias“) , Adam Baldwin (“Chuck“), Sean Maher, and Alan Tudyk. Christina Hendricks (“Mad Men“) had a recurring role.    -Jonathan B Perry

morena baccarin v firefly

Join the fight.  Help bring back “Firefly”!

The secret word is devotion.


Vaguely Related Sci-Fi Stuff

Logan’s Run & Population Control

World Of Warcraft…Dating?

Esperanto Rhymes with Tonto

 

 

jewelstaitefirefly

Jewel Staite

Subscribe for free to the Domesticated Bachelor through RSS or link to one of the buttons below! Do it!

Enter your email address: 

Delivered by FeedBurner 

http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/digg_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/reddit_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/dzone_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/stumbleupon_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/delicious_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/blinklist_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/blogmarks_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/furl_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/technorati_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/google_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/myspace_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/facebook_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/yahoobuzz_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/twitter_48.png

POLL: Who’s Your Favorite Hottie Actress of the ’50s?

LaurenBacall AudreyHepburn GraceKelly AvaGardner SophiaLoren NatalieWood actresses 50s

Clockwise from top left: Lauren Bacall, Audrey Hepburn, Grace Kelly, Natalie Wood, Sophia Loren, Ava Gardner

Poll time:  Who’s Your Favorite Hottie Actress of the ’50s?

If you’re retirement age, you might have adored these talented (and magically delicious) actresses the first time around during Hollywood’s Golden Age (circa 1950s).  Some of us younger folk have since grown to appreciate the grooviness of women who could be our grandmothers.  I think I mentioned before that I’m a bit of a Natalie Portman fan (see exhibit A & exhibit B), but there’s just something swell about the classic elegance of these fine Hollywood hotties.  A few of these actresses hit their heydays before the ‘50s, some just after, but they all did great work in the ‘50s. There were other excellent actresses from the period, but these are the 6 I like best (I’ve left out Elizabeth Taylor and Marilyn Monroe because they’re overly popular and just not my favs).  Please vote for your favorite and tell us why in the comments, then check back for the results (you can see the results of the Favorite Fictional Bachelor Poll and still vote!).  Feel free to research their film catalogs and get back to us.

The secret word is classic.

Related Blogginess

Celebrity Crushes:  Is Elegance Elitist?

Sound of Music Death Match!! Liesl v Maria

A Moment of Silence For Natalie Portman’s Singleness

The Girl Next Door

Intimidated By Smart Girls?

Subscribe to the Domesticated Bachelor for free through RSS or link to one of the buttons below! Do it!

Enter your email address:

Delivered by FeedBurner

http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/digg_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/reddit_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/dzone_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/stumbleupon_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/delicious_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/blinklist_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/blogmarks_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/furl_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/technorati_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/google_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/myspace_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/facebook_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/yahoobuzz_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/twitter_48.png

A Moment of Silence For Natalie Portman’s Singleness

natalieportmanblackswanpregnantengaged

by Jonathan Bryan Perry

Well dudes, by now you’ve heard the sad news that Natalie Portman is engaged & ‘with child’, as they say.  This effectively takes her off the market (though certainly she’s in a different market from, you know, us).  So, let’s have a moment of silence for Natalie Portman’s singleness.    Good.  Thanks.  Obviously, she’s not dead, but the love song I wrote for her, “Natalie Portman is Hot”, is now moot (yes, Myrtle & Blanche, I wrote love songs for other women.  And I totally rhymed hot with Huguenot.).  It doesn’t matter that I sang all 8 parts of the harmony way better than The Bee Gees or The King’s Singers ever could and I didn’t even have to undergo drastic countertenor/falsetto ‘enhancement’ surgeries.  Mostly.

Anyway Natalie, I just want to take a minute to remember ‘us’ and the special times we spent together over the years:  You acting all royal in Star Wars prequels.  Me watching alone in the dark in my Han Solo duds (ok, a Wookiee costume).  You listening to The Shins with Zach Braff in Garden State.  Me jealously wanting to lend you some slightly better Indie-ish music I was listening to at the time.  Me watching you rap awesomely on that SNL sketch.  Me Googling photos of you.  For my blog.  Really.

natalieportmanstarwars

more extreme make-up. Nat in Star Wars

Yes guys, Natalie Portman’s all gone.  It was coming, though.  We all saw it.  After she went off to that fancy university with the rich boys, you know, to emphasize her smarts with her hots, there was a poignant stripper pole scene somewhere (This is off point.  Or is it?).  Now, of course, it ends with one of her co-stars.  The collective mourning probably started back when she shaved her head in V for Vendetta (and for the super-lame ending of the movie.  WTH?), but we at least knew her hair would grow back.  Also, she does have a nice skull.  Yes, there were signs.  We’ll take some solace knowing she spent some ‘special’ time with Mila Kunis in The Black Swan.  This will help. Truly.

Now, being engaged does not make one married, but when there’s a baby involved, you don’t mess with it, cuz, well, you know…  So, with much sadness, I’ll man up and wish her all the happiness in the world.  Maybe dress in a black Sith outfit for a few days before I start Googling pics of the secretarial pool from Mad Men.  For my blog, of course.

Natalie, may the force be with you.  Also, I think Jonathan is a great name for a baby.

The secret word is mourning

Related Blogginess

Intimidated by Smart Girls? (featuring Natalie Portman)

Take the pseudo-Cosmo quiz to find out your type ->

http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/2009/02/27/which-is-your-type-a-pseudo-cosmo-quiz/

Read more on types of women:

Celebrity Crushes: Is Elegance Elitist?

Celebrity Crushes: The Girl Next Door

Sound of Music DEATH MATCH!!! Liesl v Maria

Other Swellness

No Mom, I’m Not Gay

The Great Massage Adventure

Every time you click an ad, an angel gets its wings.  Also, I get like 12 cents.

Subscribe to the Domesticated Bachelor for free through RSS or link to one of the buttons below! Do it!

Enter your email address: 

Delivered by FeedBurner 

http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/digg_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/reddit_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/dzone_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/stumbleupon_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/delicious_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/blinklist_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/blogmarks_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/furl_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/technorati_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/google_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/myspace_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/facebook_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/yahoobuzz_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/twitter_48.png

FAMOUS LIVING BACHELORS

A few years ago, celeb news show The Insider listed the top 10 bachelors in Hollywood.  This is how it went:

Owen Wilson

1. George Clooney
2. Leonardo DiCaprio
3. Matthew McConaughey
4. Ryan Seacrest
5. Vince Vaughn
6. Jamie Foxx
7. Owen Wilson
8. Orlando Bloom
9. Bruce Willis
10. John Mayer

Recently, I made a list of FAMOUS HISTORICAL BACHELORS, but steered away from living bachelors.  Listing well-known contemporary bachelors is an iffy thing because a) your famous bachelor dude might only be famous to a pile of rocks and b) as long as these guys live, the possibility exists that they’ll get sucked into the institution of marriage, thus nullifying certain bachelorhoods.  For instance, Vince Vaughn, who was listed in the above list, was married in January, so he no longer qualifies.  Of course, any list can be rewritten, modified and tossed.  Having said that, here is, after several minutes of carelessly intense online research, my list of famous contemporary bachelors (in no particular order).  As always, if you find some other good examples, let me know by leaving insane rambling comments & I’ll either edit them in or save them for another list.

  • Bill Maher (comedian/caustic)
  • Ed Koch (former mayor of NYC)
  • David Souter (former Supreme Court Justice)
  • Anthony Kiedis (singer for Red Hot Chili Peppers)
  • Anthony Michael Hall (actor)
  • Jeremy Piven (actor)
  • Karl Lagerfeld (fashion designer)
  • Lindsey Graham (US Senator from SC)

    Adam Clayton of U2

  • Matt Dillon (actor)
  • Philip Seymour Hoffman (actor)
  • Rick Rubin (music producer)
  • Ricky Gervais (actor/comedian)
  • Ralph Nader (politician)
  • Ron Jeremy (porn actor)
  • Tyler Perry (writer/director/actor)
  • Adam Clayton (bassist for U2)
  • Al Pacino (actor)
  • Billy Idol (rocker)
  • Carl Lewis (Olympian)
  • Kevin Spacey (actor)
  • Morrissey (singer-songwriter)
  • Quentin Tarentino (director/actor)
  • Vin Diesel (actor)
  • Drew Carey (actor/comedian)-engaged
  • Hugh Grant (actor)
  • Leonardo DiCaprio (actor)
  • Matthew McConaughey (actor-has 2 kids with his girlfriend)
  • Gene Simmons (lead singer of KISS has 2 kids with longtime partner & former Playboy Playmate Shannon Tweed)
  • Ryan Seacrest (tv & radio host)
  • Jamie Foxx (actor/singer)
  • Owen Wilson (actor)
  • Orlando Bloom (actor)
  • John Mayer (singer-songwriter)
  • George Clooney (actor)

(These men are reportedly unmarried heterosexuals, though some may be in long term relationships and have children.  A few are believed to be homosexual, but have stayed mum on the issue.)

Related Posts:

Famous Historical Bachelors- A List

The Remaining Bachelor Princes

Bachelor Profiles: Vincent Van Gogh
BACHELORS IN HISTORY

Bachelor Profiles: Sherlock Holmes

BACHELORS IN CATHOLICISM

Bachelor Profiles: Mad King Ludwig

Bachelor Profiles: The Bachelor President

List Posts:

My Bucket List-100 Things To Do Before I Die

My 25 Humanoid Things

My 11 Favorite Christmas Albums

Resolutions for 2010

4 Ways to Screw Up a Perfectly Good Thing

11 Steps to Becoming a DB

Sign up with the Domesticated Bachelor through RSS or link to one of the buttons below! Do it! It’s free and stuff.

Enter your email address: 

Delivered by FeedBurner 

http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/digg_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/reddit_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/dzone_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/stumbleupon_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/delicious_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/blinklist_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/blogmarks_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/furl_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/technorati_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/google_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/myspace_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/facebook_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/yahoobuzz_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/twitter_48.png

The Brady Bunch: “Time To Change”

The Brady Bunch kids wish to remind of the time change by singing this puberty-induced song.  Push your clocks ahead an hour today (if you’ve already done it, don’t do it twice).  Be sure to tip Peter Brady on the way out.

The secret word is tiger.

Subscribe to the Domesticated Bachelor for free through RSS or link to one of the buttons below! Do it!

Enter your email address:

Delivered by FeedBurner

http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/digg_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/reddit_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/dzone_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/stumbleupon_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/delicious_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/blinklist_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/blogmarks_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/furl_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/technorati_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/google_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/myspace_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/facebook_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/yahoobuzz_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/twitter_48.png

JAMES BOND: Bachelor Spy

by Jonathan Bond Perry

james bond casino royale daniel craig poster 007

Daniel Craig as Bond

Last night I totally ignored the Academy Awards and all the Oscar weirdness, instead watching Sean Connery in the James Bond film From Russia with Love.  Within the first 40 minutes at least 8 stunning women (I lost count) were featured in places like London, Russia, and Istanbul (not Constantinople), and a fancy spy briefcase complete with a handful of gadget-y weapons was shown to 007 for his approval.  There’s also some stimulating repartee with Miss Moneypenny.  In another scene while spying on a woman in a secret meeting, a colleague asked Bond “How does she look to you?”, to which he responds “From this angle things are shaping up nicely.  I’d like to see her in the flesh.”.  Oh, and after a belly-dancing scene, there’s a catfight between 2 hot gypsy women who don’t seem to be overdressed.  (There were also goats, but that’s a side thing.)

James Bond is awesome.  His job, nay his duty, as debonair spy for MI6 (British Intelligence), has him traveling the world, wearing sharp suits, driving magnificent autos, and entangling with exotic and dangerous beauties who seem to have left most of their clothing in the other bag.  Bond has engineers constantly creating cool new spy toys to help him dispatch the enemy, which he always does with panache.  Why am I using French words like panache and debonair when Bond is clearly English?  Maybe I want to be beaten up by the james-bond-logo golden eye bullet pierce brosnanbullies in my head.  I don’t know.  But I do know this: James Bond is perhaps the prime vanguard of all bachelors.  He epitomizes the Domesticated Bachelor.  He’s suave, stylish, sophisticated, and completely fictional.  Truly a standard bearer.

James Bond was created in 1952 by British journalist Ian Fleming while on holiday at his Jamaican estate, Goldeneye.  Yeah, Goldeneye.  Fleming wrote twelve novels and two short story collections about 007, who, it’s said, was actually modeled on Fleming, himself something of an overly-confident manwhore.  Beginning with the 1962 release of Dr. No, there have been 22 Bond films in the EON Production series, making it the longest running, most financially successful English-language film franchise in history (at least through the most recent film, Quantum of Solace).  After Fleming’s death in 1964, several other writers authored James Bond novels and screenplays and perhaps named their Sedona estates Moonraker and Thunderball, but maybe not.  James Bond has also been spoofed, most famously in the Austin Powers series by Mike Myers.

James Bond collection2 007 actors roger moore sean connery timothy dalton george lazenby daniel craig pierce brosnanBond’s date of birth often changed from story to story, frequently leaving him in his 40s, which apparently is an ideal age for spy-adventure coolness and gives me a small degree of comfort as I near that middling decade of life.  Over the years, 007 has been portrayed on the big screen by several actors, most notably by Sean Connery and Roger Moore.  These are usually considered the classic Bonds.  In fact, there was a situation in 1983 where 2 different Bond movies played in theaters simultaneously.  Roger Moore was in the EON production of Octopussy, when Sean Connery, the previous EON Bond, was brought back as Bond in the non-EON Never Say Never Again.  Eventually MGM purchased the name “James Bond”, so this problem could never be repeated.  007 has also been portrayed by Timothy Dalton, George Lazenby, David Niven (in an early spoof), Pierce Brosnan, and most recently Daniel Craig.

Bond music is easily recognizable the world over.  The Bond theme is a super instrumental used in every movie, then a different song usually opens each film and this song is sung by one of the current hot singers.  Some of the best include Paul McCartney and Wings doing “Live and Let Die“, Duran Duran in “A View to a Kill“, and “Nobody Does it Better” sung by Carly Simon for The Spy Who Loved MeShirley Bassey sang three Bond themes.

james-bond-goldfinger shirley eaton jill masterson

Don’t get how her panty bits turned gold, but it’s advanced science

James Bond has had many relationships with women, often quite meaningless relationships.  Of course he’s on the go a lot, sometimes the women are spies, and sometimes they die or turn gold and then die.  At one point, though, Bond marries, but on their wedding day his bride is killed by his archenemy (seems like the writer’s convenient way of keeping Bond single).

Yes, women love 007, at least the ones in his movies (some of my married friends aren’t so keen).  Between the exciting job, the snazzy clothes, the good looks, the sweet rides, and the strong self-esteem, he has little trouble with the fictional ladies.  He’s the sort of guy other guys hope to emulate, minus the murder.  And the excessive manwhoring.

The secret word is Moneypenny.

Related Reading:

Bachelor Profiles: Mad King Ludwig

Bachelor Profiles: Vincent Van Gogh

Bachelor Profiles: Sherlock Holmes

BACHELORS IN CATHOLICISM

Bachelors In History

Famous Historical Bachelors-A List

Becoming A Domesticated Bachelor:  The Right Wardrobe

Subscribe to the Domesticated Bachelor through RSS or link to one of the buttons below! Do it!

Enter your email address:
Delivered by FeedBurner

http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/digg_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/reddit_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/dzone_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/stumbleupon_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/delicious_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/blinklist_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/blogmarks_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/furl_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/technorati_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/google_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/myspace_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/facebook_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/yahoobuzz_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/twitter_48.png

Famous Historical Bachelors-A List

by Jonathan Bippity Perry

Billy Idol

Billy Idol

I’ve been compiling a list of famous historical bachelors for a while for no reason. Maybe for future blog posts or so I can worm them annoyingly into awkward conversations.  Maybe I’ll write a cleverly titled book, BACHELOR Profiles In Courage (And Shame), and sneak copies into the Kennedy sections of bookstores and libraries.  I’ve already written about some of the dudes in previous blog posts, if only to help single guys realize how successful they can be with fewer distractions.  Death or some sort of finality is needed to gauge one’s determination at bachelorhood, so I haven’t really included too many modern celebs.  I might throw in living guys like Billy Idol just to mix things up (I’m pretty sure he’s still alive.  And single.).  If you find some other good examples, let me know by leaving insane rambling comments.

Guys I’ve Already Written About (linked for your pleasure)
Vincent Van Gogh
King Ludwig II (Mad King Ludwig)
President James Buchanan (The Bachelor President)
Sherlock Holmes (yeah, he’s fictional)
Jesus
Thomas Aquinas

beethoven

Beethoven

Musicians
Franz Schubert
Johannes Brahms
Maurice Ravel
Frederic Chopin
George Gershwin
Ludwig van Beethoven

Artists
Edgar Degas
Edvard Munch
Leonardo DaVinci
Toulouse-Lautrec

Philosophers & Theorists & Writers
Blaise Pascal
Isaac Newton
Adam Smith
Arthur Schopenhauer
Voltaire
W.H. Auden
Immanuel Kant
Henry David Thoreau

Other Random Single Dudes
Edward Heath (former British PM)
Meriwether Lewis
George Eastman

As I study up on some of these goats and discover a few were actually married (or perhaps really women), thus shortening the list, I may be required to add modern bachelors in hopes that they stay lonely (I mean single) for the rest of their lives.  In that event, here are some guys still living (except for a dead one).

Modern Bachelors

Andre the Giant Princess Bride

Andre the Giant (top) w/dudes from The Princess Bride

Billy Idol
Ralph Nader
Al Pacino
Drew Carey (apparently engaged)
Bill Maher
Hugh Grant
Leo DiCaprio
Ed Koch
Anthony Michael Hall
Andre the Giant (yeah, he’s dead)
George Clooney

The secret fake word is spaz.

Related Reading:

Famous LIVING Bachelors

The Remaining Bachelor Princes

Bachelor Profiles: Vincent Van Gogh

BACHELORS IN HISTORY

Bachelor Profiles: Sherlock Holmes

BACHELORS IN CATHOLICISM

Bachelor Profiles: Mad King Ludwig

Bachelor Profiles: The Bachelor President

Subscribe to the Domesticated Bachelor through RSS or link to one of the buttons below! Do it!  It’s free and stuff.

Enter your email address: 

Delivered by FeedBurner 

http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/digg_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/reddit_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/dzone_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/stumbleupon_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/delicious_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/blinklist_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/blogmarks_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/furl_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/technorati_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/google_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/myspace_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/facebook_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/yahoobuzz_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/twitter_48.png

Esperanto Rhymes With Tonto

incubus1by Jonathan B. Perry

I mentioned in the Logan’s Run post that I’d visited a peace museum which also, ironically, featured an exhibit on population control. At this peace museum outside of Lincoln, NE (which is now closed) they took things a crazy step further: there was also an exhibit featuring the joys of Esperanto. Esperanto is that weird language created in the late 19th century which was designed as a secondary language to facilitate communication between other languages and possibly people using bongs. The Esperanto people also throw peace in there as one of its intended attributes (that must be how they fit it into the museum). Basically, it’s

L L Zamenhof created Esperanto

L L Zamenhof created Esperanto

like speaking a combo of broken English, broken Spanish, and broken Italian and hoping to be understood by some hot French chick across the café.

It’s believed that there are a thousand native speakers today, while over the last century Esperanto has been used by approximately 100,000 to 2 million people, many of whom are probably bachelors who also speak Klingon, I‘m quite sure. It just so happens that a movie was made in the 1960s using Esperanto. Incubus was a horror B-movie, starring the great William Shatner (of TJ Hooker fame), that used only Esperanto in its dialogue. It’s kind of an interesting arty movie, if a little Satanic around the ears, and while that might not achieve peace, it‘s good for killing a lazy afternoon. And possibly good taste.

Some Esperanto Links:

www.esperanto.net

lingvo.org

en.lernu.net

Kurso de Esperanto

Largely Unrelated Reading:

Logan’s Run and Population Control

Google-Stalking the Ex

1950’s Instructional Film: What To Do On A Date

Children, Braid Your Nosehairs

Bachelors In History

Bachelor Profiles: Sherlock Holmes

BACHELORS IN CATHOLICISM

Bachelor Profiles: Mad King Ludwig

Bachelor Profiles: The Bachelor President

Subscribe to the Domesticated Bachelor through RSS or link to one of the buttons below! Do it!

Enter your email address: Delivered by FeedBurner

http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/digg_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/reddit_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/dzone_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/stumbleupon_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/delicious_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/blinklist_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/blogmarks_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/furl_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/technorati_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/google_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/myspace_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/facebook_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/yahoobuzz_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/twitter_48.png

11 Steps To Becoming A Domesticated Bachelor: #6. Be A Jack Of All Trades

jeopardy_lby Jonathan B. Perry

An important part of becoming a Domesticated Bachelor is being a Jack of All Trades.  Being a Jack of All Trades isn’t quite the same as being a know it all.  Or a jackass, though they can, and often do, overlap.  It means being able to function moderately in most broad areas of knowledge.  It’s being well rounded, knowing a fair amount about Russian literature, Biblical carpentry, snake oil sales, and Congolese kayak repair, but not being enough of an expert to really excel or do much with that knowledge.

Being a Jack of All Trades still comes in handy because you’d know a little about most subjects and would be able to converse superficially about Congolese politics with your Congolese cleaning-lady before your cultured dinner party starts (she’s the exiled Congolese president‘s estranged goddaughter who’s cleaning your kitchen drain boards) or you could avoid major embarrassment if in a situation that requires minor skills, like changing a golf cart tire near the twelfth hole or planting a row of miniature fruit trees or naming your polo team after a Nabakov novel (the Hammered Lolitas!).  You can become a Jack of All Trades by dipping your toe a little in each subject.  This is best done by reading the first ten pages or so of several books.  Also, you could spend 6 or 7 years in college taking, or at least starting, many courses, perhaps changing your major several times along the way.  If you need real help doing any of this stuff in an actual skillful way you can always look up instructions online or buy one of those Dummies/Idiots books.  I suspect you might need several.jack-of-all-trades-king-gee

Best of all, being the Jack of All Trades Dude that you are, you might make a decent Jeopardy! contestant because, even though your knowledge might not be very deep, it’s grown very broad.  Broad knowledge is key to excelling in multiple Jeopardy! categories and since there are 13 of them in each game you‘re well on your way.  Being on Jeopardy! is a major signifier of intelligence and will help cement your Bachelor Domestication, potentially acting as an aphrodisiac to at least a few disturbed women, especially the cute librarian types best depicted by Shirley Jones in The Music Man.  Then you might get to meet Alex Trebek, who’s grown back his mustache, and talk to him about the role of Congolese political art in Russian Orthodox literature while changing a golf shopping cart tire in the middle of your golf-course-dwarf-pomegranate-orchard-cemetery game, where the motto’s always been ‘Play through or die!’  Don’t be too long because the Hammered Lolitas play next.

Read the first 5 steps:

#5. Travel the World

#4. Learn to Cook

#3. Shape Up, Fatty

#2. The Right Wardrobe

#1. THE BACHELOR PAD

Subscribe to the Domesticated Bachelor through RSS or link to one of the buttons below!  Do it!

Enter your email address:

Delivered by FeedBurner

http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/digg_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/reddit_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/dzone_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/stumbleupon_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/delicious_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/blinklist_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/blogmarks_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/furl_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/technorati_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/google_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/myspace_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/facebook_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/yahoobuzz_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/twitter_48.png

CELEBRITY CRUSHES: IS ELEGANCE ELITIST?

marytylermoore-sweaterby Jonathan B. Perry
Last time we talked about crushworthy celebrity women, particularly those who are like the Girl Next Door (GND).  Now, on the Elegant side of things are those women who maintain a certain charming dignity about them, not only signified by their fine dress, but largely for the grace, class, and decorum maintained while changing a flat tire or a loaded diaper.  They may also be any Jane Austen character ever. I’ve noticed two peculiarities about the Elegant celebrity women I have crushes on: 1st, that I haven’t placed very many into this category, and 2nd, they reached the peaks of their popularities in distant eras before you could put a computer on your lap or a phone in your pocket.

Some of my favorite elegant women include Mary Tyler Moore (Especially on The Dick Van Dyke Show.  Yum.), Grace Kelly, Julie Andrews, Lauren Bacall (photo right), and Natalie Wood (who split time as a Girl Next Door).  Between them, they did the bulk of their best work in the 40s, 50s, 60s, and 70s when I was either not alive or super young.  My perceptions of them as elegant may be incomplete because most had other types into which they could fit, like Mary Tyler Moore might also moonlight as a Funny Girl Next Door who was later stuck wearing bad 70s clothes, unfortunately.lauren-bacall3

It could be that Hollywood was more elegant in the old days and therefore the characters were often more elegant and traditional.  Having said that, Hollywood may now be placing an emphasis on the Girl Next Door type, fully aware of the homespun attractiveness.  With Elegant women, it seems their qualities are timeless and I still really like them.  Of course, most actresses, on the surface, seem elegant when it comes time for an award show like the Oscars. But the fact that there are many fewer contemporary examples of Elegant women begs the question:  Is Elegant a dying breed?  Is it just a dress to be put on for the red carpet or the correct placement of a salad fork?  Is elegance elitist or just old fashioned? Is Hollywood forcing them out as part of an invisible French Revolution?

I recently read the James Herriot All Creatures Great and Small books about veterinarians in Yorkshire, England in the 1930s.  The books were excellent.  My friend Wendy then told me about the BBC series from the 1970s and I checked it out at the library.  This was also quite good and I developed a great fondness for the main actress, Carol Drinkwater, who played Helen Herriot.  You might say I’m smitten.

Doesn't Carol Drinkwater look a little like Evangeline Lilly? or vice versa?

Doesn't Carol Drinkwater look a little like Evangeline Lilly? or vice versa?

She‘s fantastic and seems to blend all the good stuff together: Girl Next Door who is Elegant and a little Funny. Anyway, to top it off, I recently learned she played a small part in Kubrick’s A Clockwork Orange, a non-Elegant, non-Girl Next Door movie.  I remember some weird/freaky stuff from A Clockwork Orange, and of course now I’ll have to rewatch it with this new and interesting revelation (I certainly won‘t say anything about Julie Andrews‘ topless scene in the ‘80s.  That would just confuse things.).

So, yeah.  Elegant, good.  Girl Next Door, good.  Smart, Funny, Quirky.  Good.

ADDENDUM:  I just remembered I really like Anne Hathaway, too.  Magically delicious.  She’s Elegant and maybe a little Girl Next Door-esque.  So there is a modern one.  Yay!

Related Reading:

Celebrity Crushes:  The Girl Next Door

Sound Of Music Death Match!! Liesl v Maria

Which Is Your Type? A Pseudo-Cosmo Quiz

Intimidated By Smart Girls?

Google-Stalking the Ex

Valentine’s Day Shame

Dating Advice From The Family

Family Advice: A Reversal (S0rt Of)

Dating Satisfaction Survey

Changing Your Relationship Status On A Social-Networking Site

Subscribe to the Domesticated Bachelor through RSS or link to one of the buttons below! Do it!

Enter your email address:

Delivered by FeedBurner

http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/digg_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/reddit_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/dzone_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/stumbleupon_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/delicious_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/blinklist_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/blogmarks_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/furl_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/technorati_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/google_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/myspace_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/facebook_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/yahoobuzz_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/twitter_48.png

Celebrity Crushes: The Girl Next Door

jenna-pam-the-office
by Jonathan B. Perry
I’m not one of those guys who is big on the celebrity crushes, but sometimes it will occur to me that this actress is striking in a special way or that actress/singer/model/heiress has something I find extra swell.  After carefully evaluating my favorite female celebrities with colorful graphs and misguided psycho-analysis, I’ve found I have a preference for those who generally fall into two categories: the Girl Next Door and Elegant.

The Girl Next Door (GND) type and the Elegant type are two fairly common types for a crush, but other types of women for whom one might crush include Sexpot, Bad Girl, Funny, Quirky, Smart, and Sporty.  This female grouping thing is basically a Spice Girl game (or female 7 Dwarfs for my Disney-cum-World of Warcraft friends) wherein each girl represents a different personality generalization.  Women in these other types may be excellent, but don’t resonate as much with me (Funny and Quirky do, but less on a celebrity level), possibly because I’m most drawn to women with whom I could see myself, and for me those women are mostly elegant or like the girl next door.

The Girl Next Door (GND) is easy to talk to.  The two of you could spend a fun Sunday in the park together feeding ducks (to pigeons) and throwing around the frisbee or you might enjoy taking a nice stroll downtown to window shop, especially if you’re impoverished.  Having grown up with the GND you feel very comfortable with her, but above all, she’s someone who’s human and pretty hot at the same time.  Also, the girl next door seems like someone who might be tricked into dating you.  This is perhaps the main thing.  For those of us who like this type of girl, a good arch-type is Jenna Fischer‘s character, Pam Beasley on The Office.  She’s good-looking, but doesn’t really know it and is maybe a little shy, but friendly and very approachable.

Evangeline Lilly’s character Kate on LOST used to have this GND type nailed, being all cute and innocent and freckly, but as the show has progressed, her character has been revealed to be a wily criminal, so flawed, in fact, that it moves her into the Bad Girl category and out of the center of my broken heart (country song to follow). Other good GND types include Gretchen Mol from Life On Mars (US), French actress Audrey Tautou who starred in Amelie, the late Natalie Wood (who splits time with Elegant), Anna Friel who played Chuck in Pushing Daisies, and, of course, Natalie Portman. Of course.

samantha-brown_2007My uncle John and I were recently expressing our great appreciation for the super-excellent Samantha Brown who has shows on the Travel Channel. She embodies the Funny category and still works the GND (ooh, combo-types are  extra special).  Giada De Laurentiis, with shows on the Food Network, actually looks a little like Natalie Portman.  She’s great and wouldn’t mind you eating garlic around her. It seems evident from this list that I watch a bit too much television and should be loaded with celebriphile shame.  But where else would I go?  Politics?

In reality, the closest I come to having a crush on a real girl next door, at the moment anyway, is the blogger Brigitte Dale who, until recently, lived in the same Midwest town in which I live.

Brigitte Dale

Brigitte Dale

I haven’t actually met her, but I think she’s swell.  Her video blogs are adorable and she has a smart and quirky writing style which I think is very endearing and funny.  Brigitte seems to fit the GND category well by coming across as an approachable hometown girl who’s really darn pretty.  Of course, she is a writer, so it is possible she could be a devious bunny shaver by night.

Next time we’ll look at the Elegant Women.  As if we had a shot.

(Oh, we’ve had 30,000 hits now!  In less than 3weeks!!  Thank you.  So much love.)

The secret word is trickery.

(Part 2-Celebrity Crushes: Is Elegance Elitist?)

(Part 3-Intimidated By Smart Girls?)

(Part 4-Which Is Your Type? A Pseudo-Cosmo Quiz)

Sound Of Music Death Match!! Liesl v Maria

Related Reading:

Google-Stalking the Ex

Valentine’s Day Shame

Dating Advice From The Family

Family Advice:  A Reversal (S0rt Of)

Dating Satisfaction Survey

Changing Your Relationship Status On A Social-Networking Site

Subscribe to the Domesticated Bachelor through RSS or link to one of the buttons below! Do it!

Enter your email address: Delivered by FeedBurner

http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/digg_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/reddit_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/dzone_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/stumbleupon_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/delicious_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/blinklist_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/blogmarks_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/furl_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/technorati_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/google_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/myspace_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/facebook_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/yahoobuzz_48.png http://www.thedomesticatedbachelor.com/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/twitter_48.png