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Online Dating: Should You Try It?

by Jonathan Beriberi Perry

It seems that the future of dating is here and its name is legion, for we are many! Actually, it‘s ‘online dating‘.  If you’re a shy person who doesn’t get out much or someone who’s already exhausted the shallow pool of singles in your area, or if you just live in a small backwoods community in the hills where it turns out the only eligible females in the town are your blood relatives, then online dating might be your bag.  Really, it’s even good for normal people in normal sized towns who want to increase their chances of finding that special someone without leaving the couch or putting on pants.  I know of at least 5 couples that have met online and developed person to person relationships, some of them arguably normal, and even though only 2 of these couples are still together, online dating seems to be an effective means of getting people together.  It’s a technological matchmaker.

See.  No Pants.

See. No Pants.

Heretofore, the cultivation of personal social skills, mono a mono action (not fencing), was needed to just get into conventional dating, and for those of us poor single saps who are past our golden college years, there’s a decrease in premium opportunities to practice and keep these dating skills sharp unless you’ve mastered the barhopping scene or don’t mind risking the HR problems at work.  Online dating opens up your options incredibly.

One of my friends, we’ll call him Yorick, recently had a rewarding relationship that started on a non-dating social networking site that we’ll call Ego Air (like no one will decode that).  He only got onto the site after his sister set up a profile for him as a surprise, so this dating relationship was a happy accident because he wasn‘t looking to date.  He felt disinclined to put himself out there until he’d taken care of a few personal issues first which caused him low self-esteem and periodic melancholy (He has a weirdly-shaped head.  I think it‘s fine.).  Yorick was only looking for old friends online and had little notion to date, but it was through these old school friends that he was introduced to a lovely young lady who still had most of her teeth.  They dated a few months and, though the person to person relationship didn’t quite work as well as it had online, they had a good time and learned a lot from the experience.  Sure.  Let’s be optimistic (Alas, poor Yorick. See, that‘s why I used the name.).

I may even try the online dating thing myself sometime.  Or not.  I’d probably use one of those scientific dating sites with the quizzes and personality assessments, so there‘d be some pretense of choosiness to back up my own weird standards.  Of course, I‘d have to study up to find out which sites are better and how best to interact with female humans online.

online datingHowever, because I’m a coward and currently unprepared for the world of online dating, and possibly the other kinds, I’ll have to defer to the experience of another friend, Gregg.  My buddy Gregg has been dating online for a few years now and has met dozens, nay, scores of prospects from all over the world through several dating sites, though it seems many of the girls, especially from Ukraine or Nigeria, often just want money (I‘m sure there are plenty of fine, upstanding young ladies from these wonderful countries who aren’t asking for money (upfront) and don’t want to be lumped with the others, but, whoomp, there it is.).

These women are quick to profess their love and just need some financial assistance for their visa fees or travel arrangements or to pay their hospital bills from that terrible plane crash in the blizzard with Buddy Holly, The Big Bopper and that guy who sang “La Bamba“.  Despite these needy few, Gregg enjoys dating online and seems casual about it, making good friendships.  He hasn’t paid any visa fees.  Yet.  He’s even met one or two of the young ladies in person, though the relationships haven’t gone further.  Maybe one will stick for him at some point.  I hope so.  He’s a super guy.  Nicely-shaped head.

Gregg inspires me to think that I should get back in the game again, but I still feel a bit cautious about online dating.  Or calling it ’the game’, because that‘s a hugely dorky sounding name which should be expunged from all communication.  I may stick with the mono a mono stuff.  I hear HR is more lenient this year, so there you go.

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10 Responses to “Online Dating: Should You Try It?”

  • Johanna:

    you tell your buddy Greg if he had only provided me with his bank account info, I so would have flown directly from Nigeria and married him…..not :-)

    Yea, online dating, I just find creepy. Though my Patrick did use the online spectrum to ask me out on my first day, e-mail…..on a whole online dating is creepy. It is like a blind date every time and I don’t know about other people but for those of us who lie, def. not me, in the online world…they make it just that more precarious to meet a sane non-axe wielding potential love match.

    In the meantime, I stick to the rule that I am 5.9, 125 pounds, blond hair, have a doctorate in astro-physicists, work part time as a super model in Milan, sing back up for U2, spend my holidays trekking various remote areas, climbed K2 last year, and am a gourmet chef. (recently broke up with Brad Pitt to marry Patrick)

  • admin:

    Wow! Lying on the resume of LOVE. I knew it!
    I don’t think online dating would be too bad, really. I dunno. I think a few of those online site have background checks and a few of them, eharmony in particular, seem to use special matching stuff. So I’ve heard. That would be useful, but it’s true people could write or answer however it benefited them most. Also, pics could be old or altered. The online stuff could be an advantage for those in the boonies or in all-girls’ schools.

  • Melanie Pierce:

    I tried several online singles matches way back when… went on a few dates… pictures can definitely be deceiving (like when the upper half totally doesn’t prepare you for the lower half!) Nevertheless… they were all pretty normal nice guys… just not the perfect person for me! I totally recommend it… it was loads of fun! As it turns out the guy I did marry?? I met him in church. (And have never emailed him once.) In fact, he barely knows how to turn a computer on!

  • admin:

    You tried it, huh? Cool. I think most people want to meet their someone organically (or whatever); naturally and unforced, like you did with your husband (I think the metaphor broke down). Maybe that’s just me. I don’t know. Meeting at church or at a friend’s birthday party or at putt putt with a bunch of people would be cool. Good stuff. I’ll read this in the morning & edit the donkeys out of it.

  • Edward Simmons:

    Most of the readers on this site seem to be in their twenties and thirties at most. Wait until you are in your 60s as I am and see how much more difficult it is to meet someone interesting. I used online dating and found all the people I met were normal and nice & I even dated some of them four or five times. Just haven’t found THE ONE yet. I got my confidence to use online dating by reading the book Internet Safari, Finding Love Online at 65 by Gordon Scott Edwards. If your not hug up on the age difference, you might try that book too and see if it helps deal with some doubts about internet dating.

  • admin:

    That’s fantastic, Edward! Glad to hear online dating is proving effective and that you found some nice and normal folks. It does seem to be getting more and more difficult to meet people in person. Makes me think how valuable college was for such stuff. Thanks for the book references, too.
    Best of luck on your search!

  • Johanna:

    My husband used online dating in his late 40s and early 50s….it did not work out….good thing for me! He also has nothing positive to say about it, could just be the fact we are stuck in the middle of the ND will minimal population options when it comes to hot older babes.

  • admin:

    Was he only limiting himself to Dakota babes? Dakota women are lovely, but that certainly decreased his pool of options.

  • Johanna:

    Oh no! He also investigated woman out of the state and country. Some were possibilities, but hell would have to freeze over before they came to the ND. I guess he could have left but then my snagging him would have ceased to exist.

    Then there were the ones from other countries that apparently needed lots of monetary support to come to the US. Yea, right….

  • admin:

    Did Boy Wonder use online dating? Like to be fly on the wall for that.
    I wouldn’t mind a little monetary support to visit England again. I’m just saying.